Sex and Sex and the City

By Tom Chivers Published: 11:02AM GMT 17 Feb 2010

The Sex and the City girls, Charlotte, Carrie, Miranda and Samantha: Do Sex and the City watchers have more sex, better sex, more adventurous sex?

(A third group, most easily defined as "men", are completely baffled by it, and wonder why they are expected to care about the bleak, self-absorbed life of some vapid New York journalist and her caricatured friends, even if they do have some good one-liners. But they are not relevant here.)

But who is right? Do Sex and the City watchers have more sex, better sex, more adventurous sex? Are they more likely to sleep around? We took a look at the figures; 945 women in total answered the survey, 466 who have watched the programme, 479 who have not.

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A word of warning: the data here is not sub-divided. We know that the average Sex and the City watcher, for example, is much younger than the average non-watcher (76 per cent of 25- to 34-year-olds have seen the show, compared to just 42 per cent of 45- to 54-year olds). What we can"t do is assess from this data how much more likely SATC-watching 45-to-54-year-olds are to, say, enjoy their sex lives than non-watching women of the same age. So be a little careful of any shocked conclusions you may draw below.

Sex and the City watchers want good sex (and they want it when they want it)

Your average Carrie fan is considerably more voracious than the non-watcher. 14 per cent of those women who have lost their virginity and watched the show say that they usually initiate sex, compared to just eight per cent of those who haven"t. More Samantha than Charlotte, then. (The national average is 29% however so this is taken out of context slightly)

SATC watchers want good sex (but don"t seem to be getting it)

Asked to rate how happy they were with their sex lives, 24 per cent of SATC-watchers described themselves as "not at all happy" or "unhappy", compared to 22 per cent of those who hadn"t seen it. At the other end of the scale, 43 per cent said they were "happy" or "very happy" less than the 46 per cent of non-watchers who said the same. Shades of Berger and Carrie"s unsuccessful trysts? Or, as the lady herself might say in voiceover: do we have a right to good sex? And, of course, how good? See below.

SATC watchers get good sex (despite what they claim above)

Obviously there"s more to sex than just reaching orgasm, but nonetheless, it seems the show"s fans are being a little demanding. 69 per cent (yes, 69; feel free to snicker) say they "always" or "sometimes" achieve climax during sex, compared to 64 per cent of non-fans. So they"re having more orgasms, but worse sex, which may suggest that they"re setting their sights a bit high. Watchers are also more likely to think about sex all the time; 68 per cent think about it "at least once every few days" or more often, compared to 45 per cent.

SATC watchers are really good at sex (and aren"t afraid to say so)

Intriguingly, while they are less likely to be satisfied with their sex lives, SATC fans are pretty confident they"re not to blame. 42 per cent rate themselves as "Excellent" or "Good" in bed, compared to 34 per cent of non-fans. Conversely just eight per cent of watchers think they are "not at all good" or "not good", compared to 11 per cent of the rest of the population. So all that bad sex they"re having it"s someone else"s fault, it seems.

SATC watchers want good sex (sooner rather than later, please)

They might not enjoy it, but SATC fans certainly can"t be accused of not giving it a proper try. Watchers are more likely to have sex earlier in a nascent relationship (37 per cent by end of fourth date, compared to 20 per cent of non-watchers), and are more likely to lose their virginity earlier (mean age 17.75, almost six months younger than the non-watchers" 18.24). They are also more likely to have had sex recently (56 per cent compared to 49 per cent) and more likely to have it regularly (9.08 times in the average month, compared to 8.84). Still, they clearly aren"t happy about it.

SATC watchers know good sex toys (and aren"t afraid to ask for them in Ann Summers)

A whopping 44 per cent of Carrie fans own a sex toy. That"s almost 1.5 times as many as the rest of the female population who do not watch the show (31 per cent). What is not clear is how many of them are misusing a neck massager, a la Samantha, although we hope that that data will become available in a future survey.

SATC watchers know good sex (but don"t want to look at their partner"s face while they"re doing it)

While the positional thinking of SATC fans is largely the same as that of everyone else, they do have a greater preference for doggy-style sex than everyone else (20 per cent as opposed to 14). It would be cruel to make a Sarah Jessica Parker joke something about not wanting to look a gift horse in the mouth, maybe so we won"t.

SATC watchers have had good sex (but not for a while)

This might be surprising, on the face of it: although SATC is all about women in late youth and early middle age having lots of sex, the show"s fans are more likely to have had their best sex in their youth; 27 per cent said that their peak came between the ages of 18 and 24, compared to 17 per cent of non-fans. By the time they got to between 35 and 44, just 18 per cent say they were still enjoying the best sex of their lives, while 25 per cent of the rest said that was their best time. However, we suspect that this is at least in part because (as mentioned above) the women who watch Sex and the City are more likely to be younger. A 34-year-old is unlikely to claim her best sex happened in the future.

SATC watchers know unprotected sex (but don"t want a baby)

Fans of the show are nearly twice as likely to have taken the morning after pill than their non-watching compatriots 34 per cent to 18 per cent. However, again, the figure should be treated with caution; they are only slightly more likely to have had unprotected sex (59 per cent to 53 per cent). We think some of the difference is to do with the morning-after pill only became available in the UK in 1984, and was not widely used for some years after that. They are, however, also more than twice as likely to have contracted a sexually transmitted infection, by eight per cent to three.

SATC watchers know good, er, marriage (and aren"t afraid to overuse a lame joke)

As you might predict, far fewer SATC watchers are married than in the general population 38 per cent compared to 58 percent of non-watchers. While it would be nice to think this is because they"re all hunting Mr Big, we should also remind you that they"re likely to be younger; obviously younger women are less likely to be married. They are also less likely to be unfaithful in that marriage (11 per cent compared to 19) although since they are more likely to sleep around when they"re in non-marital but committed relationships (25% to 18%) we think that"s again just because they haven"t had time yet.

Find out more about the sex lives of the nation in the Stella Sex Survey 2010 .

The Stella Sex Survey 2010 was conducted exclusively for Stella by YouGov plc. The 1843 respondents (898 men, 945 women) are a sample of British men and women aged 18+. They completed the online survey between 15-18th Jan 2010. The question "do you use pornography?" was asked to a sample size of 2520 on 18-19 Jan 2010; the question "how many sexual partners have you had?" was asked to a sample size of 2013 on 22-25 Jan 2010

Sexting: the new infidelity?

By Hannah Betts Published: 7:00AM GMT 20 Feb 2010

Ashley Cole and Cheryl Cole Photo: PA

This week brought word that the X Factor judge St. Cheryl Cole is planning to divorce her husband, the dastardly Ashley, following the footballers "sexting, or sex-text shenanigans. Cole would appear to be in a category all of his own when it comes to plumbing the seamier reaches of the zeitgeist. However, his sexting habit appears to be among his more conventional behaviours. Everybodys at it, or so it seems: Tiger Woods, the entire Premier League, even that nice Vernon Kay. Moreover, this is not merely a celebrity predilection. Illicit sexting is as hot as Hades, and the perpetrators will be ones colleagues, friends and, quite possibly, ones partner.

"U looked gr8. I wnt you and h8 it when were apart. Txt me a pic of Lil Mark."

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Mark not, needless to say, his real name proudly shares the latest communication from his latest crush. They average forty or so messages a day, largely concerning what each would like to do to the other. I use the word "like" advisedly, for Mark and his paramour have not yet had sexual relations not because they are teenagers, despite the txt spk but because 46-year-old Mark is married. While he texts and emails choice obscenities, he will be bathing the children or serenely watching television with his wife.

Where once the symbols of infidelity were lipstick on the collar and dubious hotel bills, so today the principal indication is likely to be repetitive stress disorder of the thumb. The technology that has allowed the working day to expand into a 24/7 slog conducted via iPhone and BlackBerry has no less enabled a hot and heavy culture of permanent flirtation; a flirtation, moreover, where the virtual may effortlessly elide into the physical.

We are used to the notion that the young are embroiled in a constant sexting deluge of booty calls and (aptly-named) Facebook pokes. However, the habit is increasingly ubiquitous among older, but apparently no wiser, individuals, many of them in relationships. Where once adulterers were forced to take some trouble to stage-manage an affair, so now he or she can seek out candidates from the family sofa.

Television presenter Vernon Kay, 35, has become the reluctant poster boy for this trend. Kay is married to Strictly Come Dancings fragrant Tess Daly, 38. He is the host of Family Fortunes, she the author of a new book on motherhood. Yet the family values central to the pairs light entertainment appeal have been tarnished by the revelation that Kay has been despatching erotic messages to not one, but a clutch of women. Kay maintains that he has not slept with his fellow sexters, but nonetheless apologised on his Radio 1 show last week, saying that something he had seen as "harmless banter" was inappropriate conduct for a married man.

Paula Hall, a psychotherapist and spokesperson for Relate, has a chapter on the symbiosis between technology and infidelity in her new book, Improving Your Relationship for Dummies. When asked whether she finds this behaviour common, her response is an emphatic: "Yes, yes!" "People can legitimately term these platonic affairs," Hall explains. "The defence is that it involves nothing sexual not even touching. But there is obviously deceit and a breach of trust. The participants are playing with fire.

"It is the holding of secrets from your partner that is damaging," she continues. "Plus youre idealising someone to whom you have constant access. In fact, it may be less about the other person than escapism into a powerfully intense world where the texter has autonomy and feels attractive. There are some couples who can successfully negotiate these boundaries, but for most it will be a case of playing Russian roulette."

A thirtysomething woman of my acquaintance vehemently agrees: "I thought I was being so modish, so virtuous. Id never flirt with a colleague in a bar, but virtual communication seemed like a harmless grey area. I can see now that I was an accident waiting to happen grooming myself and potential partners for an affair.

"Texting was my crack: an exhilaration I wasnt getting in my marriage. The man I fell into a sext affair with was always there for me, like the imaginary friend I had as a child, but with the one-track mind you have as a teen. It was brilliant, intoxicating and disastrous in terms of my marriage. My husband said he would rather I had picked up a stranger for a one-night stand. It was the intimacy of the virtual relationship he couldnt stomach." Her marriage was ongoing, but relations remain strained.

The compulsion of this seduction is that it takes place piecemeal. Spellbound by an intimacy exacerbated by lack of eye-to-eye contact, egging each other on to more graphic revelations, the sext addict craves ever more potent hits. Kay has observed how his exchanges started off "pretty innocent, yet rapidly developed into something more explicit. He also found himself using the computer phone service Skype, which allows users to view each other.

The new iPhone 3GS, among other top-of-the-range mobile phones, enables owners to send video footage, and doubtless a host of lesser models will follow suit. The video files involved are so vast that it would be rare for sexters to use them. However, as with all technology, it can only be a matter of time. Certainly, Ashley Coles alleged adeptness with MMS (sending images via text) suggests it is a small step from saying what activities one would like to engage in with another person, to demonstrating the apparatus one would use, to playing away.

Even where sexts are not made flesh, many may feel the damage has been done. Tess Daly has been reported as saying the trust is gone in her relationship, as anyone who has ever observed their partners clandestine smile on receiving a message will understand. Sexting, like sex, creates a conspiracy of two from which the rest of the world is excluded. And in a culture in which we are inseparable from our phones, the potential is always there, literally to hand.

But perhaps we are in danger of succumbing to sextual hysteria. Penny Mansfield, director of the relationship research organisation One Plus One, remains sanguine. "We tend to stress the damage technology can do to relationships, but a lot of people are using it to sort out problems."

She points to evidence from the Oxford Internet Institute to suggest that couples are using text and email to confront topics they otherwise find too challenging. Mansfield contends that there are situations in which sexting may even play something akin to a positive role. "

Often these flirtations dont involve a sexual relationship, or the break-up of a partnership, but are a way of people dealing with an unhappy time in a relationship, or a period of readjustment. They get over it and things settle down. Relationships wax and wane, but it doesnt mean they cant wax again." The waning may prove terminal for Mr and Mrs Cole. However, Kay and Daly are advised to take note.

Roger Ebert, film critic, given back voice after cancer treatment

Published: 2:45AM GMT 19 Feb 2010

Film critic Roger Ebert is pictured on the latest Esquire magazine cover Photo: REUTERS

Roger Ebert, 67, lost the ability to speak almost four years ago, following life-saving surgery on his throat.

He has since relied on hand-written notes, a form of sign language and a basic voice synthesiser to communicate.

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Now a company based at the University of Edinburgh is using new computer technology to let him communicate with his own voice once again.

Mr Ebert is said to be ""excited"" about the move and he is expected to demonstrate the system in a TV interview with Oprah Winfrey.

Scottish firm CereProc is the company behind the development.

Chief technical officer Matthew Aylett said a prototype was delivered to Mr Ebert two days ago.

He said: ""When Roger first heard it, he was very excited because he never thought he"d be able to communicate in his own voice again.

""We"re very happy to have been able to use our technology in a way which is helping someone express themselves.""

CereProc works with ""text-to-speech"" technology and specialises in producing voices which have character and emotion.

The research team became involved with Mr Ebert after he found out about their work online and contacted them last summer.

Fortunately for the veteran movie critic, his years of TV appearances and numerous DVD commentaries meant the research team had a wealth of audio material to draw upon.

The company was able to painstakingly reconstruct his voice by mining the recordings.

New words and sentences were produced by piecing together snippets of the recordings.

The end result is a comprehensive database of words and a system which can ""speak"" any typed sentence in the voice he had before his operation.

The sounds can also be tweaked by him to get the right intonation and emphasis across.

Dr Aylett said: ""One of the things that we specialise in is trying to produce voices which have got a bit of character and don"t sound neutral or boring.

""Conventional speech synthesis normally involves recording the data very carefully in a studio, where we can control what people say and the environment it"s recorded in.

""In this case we"re using audio that has been recorded for commentaries on Casablanca or Citizen Kane, for example.

""We have to take this audio and try and produce something which sounds smooth and natural.

""This synthesis sounds very much like a natural voice. It"s very important for us that the voices we"re trying to reconstruct sound as close as possible to the original speaker."" It is believed to be the first time that archive audio material has been used to benefit the speaker.

Dr Aylett said: ""This is the first time we"ve actually built a specific voice for someone who needs it.

""Roger Ebert is hoping to use it to produce his blog as an audio piece and he"s even thinking he could maybe use it on radio and television."" Dr Aylett said the technology has moved on ""dramatically"" from the type of speech system developed in the 1980s and famously used by Professor Stephen Hawking.

He said: ""Stephen Hawking is now identified by that voice, so he doesn"t want to change it.

""The difference here is the voice we"re giving Roger Ebert is actually the same voice he had before he had surgery.

""When he uses it, people who listened to his commentaries in the past as a broadcaster will recognise his voice.

""Both are examples of the way the voice is so central to who we are as people and so much of our character and personality is expressed by the use of our voice.""

Map out a walking adventure

By Adrian Tierney-Jones Published: 9:30AM GMT 18 Feb 2010

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On course: modern gadgets might be all the rage but maps give a complete 2D picture of the landscape Photo: CORBIS

The GPS or satnav is not infallible, as anyone who"s witnessed a lorry rammed between two ancient cottages can testify. Satnav has its uses, but sometimes you wish drivers would simply read a map. The same goes for walking if you really want to enjoy the countryside, forget the gadgets and mug up on your basic map-reading skills.

There are people who actively enjoy getting lost. Robert Macfarlane, author of The Wild Places (a sublime celebration of our native wilderness), is a fine example of someone who finds emotional stimulation in not knowing where he is. For most of us, however, there"s little poetry in discovering we"re crossing the wrong field

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Everyone who takes to the great outdoors has their own disaster story: the sudden fog or the snowstorm from hell that obliterated every landmark on a bleak fell. Even a path through seemingly innocent woodland can develop a sinister, fairytale quality as it leads us further away from that nice country pub.

This is where walking guide Mark Reid comes in. Based in the Yorkshire Dales, he has spent the past 10 years covering more than 8,000 miles of footpaths through the north of England. Challenges have come at him like flurries of snow on a desolate January day. Whether it"s a stygian night walk in the midst of winter, or a dense mist draped over bleak moorland, he"s been in the thick of it and has had to develop his own skills.

Reid is now sharing them with other outdoor lovers in a series of Navigation Skills weekend courses that should give even the most nervous walker a sense of place. He is not the only one to offer such courses, but the bonus is that, as author of the Inn Ways walking-and-pubs guides, you know that the post-walk refreshments will be spot on.

"Most people assume good navigation is all about being able to use a compass. In fact it is about good map skills and always knowing where you are. This is what people will learn on my courses. I don"t use a GPS there is no substitute for a map. From a map you get a complete 2D picture of the landscape."

Good preparation is key, says Reid. It might seem obvious, but you hear stories of entire families strolling along a razorback ridge in their flip-flops or walkers taking on mountains without even a waterproof, he says. Sometimes they"re lucky, but all too often the consequences of such a dilatory lack of preparation are serious, as search and rescue teams are scrambled and precious time and resources wasted.

Peter Burgess, a dedicated walker who runs fellwalkingclub.co.uk says that informing others of your whereabouts is essential. "I heard of a group who went up Borrowdale in the Lakes," he says. "They were overdue and several search and rescue teams were out looking for them, but they were already down and tucked up in bed. They hadn"t told anyone where they were going and when they would be back. The teams weren"t very happy."

When it comes to the satnav vs map and compass debate, pragmatism carries the day with Burgess. "I do carry a satnav," he admits. "But I also take a map and compass as there could be battery failure and once I was scrambling and the satnav butted a rock. You hear of people just taking their mobiles to rely on, which is madness. I take all these things; it"s a double insurance."

Reid"s two-day weekend course covers all aspects of the National Navigation Award Scheme"s Bronze level syllabus, including route planning, weather forecasts, basic map interpretation, grid references and essential clothing and equipment. Both days include a walk and, on Saturday evening, everyone goes to the pub to plan the next day"s route. On Sunday everyone takes it in turn to navigate a leg of the walk.

With its rolling hills, sweeping valleys and high moorland patched with great swathes of heather, the Yorkshire Dales are an inspirational place for walking. Over the course of the weekend you pass impressive waterfalls and traditional hay meadows, and there"s a pint and a bed at a cosy pub in an attractive stone village waiting for you at the end of a long day"s walk.

"The outdoors is here, it"s free and just waiting to be discovered," says Reid. "Some people look at it and see obstacles such as getting lost and bad weather. This course aims to get rid of those barriers."

Mark Reid"s Navigation Skills Weekends take place once a month until October and cost £79; for more details see teamwalking.co.uk/navigation_skills_weekends.html For other courses on navigation skills see nnas.org.uk/course_providers/index.shtml

Property in the Caribbean: Welcome to Barbados

By Anna Tyzack Published: 4:00PM GMT 19 Feb 2010

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Previous of Images Next Pooled resources: Solana, St James, is on sale for $16m (£10.2m) through Knight Frank; Prince Harry Photo: REX FEATURES Monkey Business $6.5m (£4.4m): A six-bedroom house in Sion Hill with open-plan living rooms and a marble terrace. It is within landscaped gardens, overlooking a private gully. Knight Frank: 020 7629 8171 Royal Westmoreland $350,000 (£222,000): Apartments at Royal Westmoreland include access to the golf and beach clubs and spa. Plans are afoot for a second 18-hole golf course. RWM: 01524 782649 Candelisa Weston Resort $144,000 (£91,400): A development of 45 apartments near Glitter Bay and Lone Star Restaurant (where Jerry Hall was recently spotted) with pool. Candelisa: 01943 882302; candelisa.com

It"s a green monkey, not a fox or a rabbit that we swerve to avoid on the road to Apes Hill, a former sugar plantation in Barbados. There are polo ponies dozing in the fields beside the drive, shaded by palm trees, and the Caribbean Sea stretches out in front of us. But for all its exoticism - sun, white sand and rum punch - the island has plenty of Britain about it. According to Fay Davies, a former A Place in the Sun presenter who moved to Apes Hill last year with her dog, Rudy, it is rather like living in a Dorset village and this is why British people like it.

Barbados has a long-standing relationship with Britain. It was a colony and protectorate for three centuries until it gained independence in 1966. The Queen is still head of state and members of the Royal family are regular visitors to the island Prince Harry was playing polo at Apes Hill last month. Families, such as Guinness and Bamford, own large swathes of land and numerous British celebrities and socialites have homes there, including the Kidd family, Cliff Richard and Andrew Lloyd Webber. The red ER letterboxes, children in smart school uniforms and the recent arrival of Waitrose, are reminders of Barbados"s connection with Britain.

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It is hardly surprising then that 85 per cent of the island"s second home owners are British. They appreciate the sunny weather and British connections (English is spoken across the island), but also the sophisticated infrastructure. "I didn"t comprehend before I moved here how switched on Barbados is," Fay says "It has all the simplicity of the Caribbean, but everything works. And because it"s only a four-hour time difference, I can still be available for colleagues in London."

James Burdess, who has lived on the island for the past 13 years with his wife and two children, agrees that Barbados"s infrastructure sets it apart from other Caribbean islands. "The beaches, the sea breezes, the culture and the people are all fantastic, but it is the things you don"t see that make me want to live here the schools, the hospitals and the sport," he says. "Here it"s a return to old-school values the crime rate is negligible, people still get dressed up to go out in the evenings and the golf courses are incredible." There is a vibrant social scene, with international polo matches and Test cricket. "You can do everything you do in England, but it"s warm," James says.

The island is made up of parishes, rather like Guernsey or Jersey. Buyers can choose whether they want a home in the hills, on a golf course, or by the sea. The wild, Atlantic coast to the east is popular with surfers and walkers, while St Thomas, in the centre of the island, has large farms and plantations. Here Knight Frank is selling Clifton Plantation, a 241-acre polo estate with a great house and cottage for $15 million (£9.5 million). St James on the west or "platinum" coast contains some of the most expensive homes in the world, as well as three of the island"s five 18-hole golf courses (Sandy Lane, Royal Westmoreland and Apes Hill). There are fashionable restaurants and bars in the parish town of Holetown, as well as shops such as Prada, Louis Vuitton and Ralph Lauren. "St James has the most established property market," says Julian Cunningham, of estate agency Knight Frank.

Until three years ago, Apes Hill in St James was a working sugar plantation. Since then it has been transformed into a world class 18-hole golf course and polo club, with about 40 villas some with views of both the east and west coast. It is owned by the Williams family, who moved from Wales to Barbados in the 17th century and will eventually include a spa, fitness centre and clubhouse. "It"s a slowburn project," says Linda Williams, of Apes Hill. "The market will dictate when it will be finished."

Buyers can choose to buy a plot (from $500,000 to $12 million) and build their own home, invest in an off-plan villa at Moonshine Ridge ($3.5 million to $8 million) or buy a home already built (from $1.9 million). Most of the owners are British CEOs and entrepreneurs, who appreciate the traditional coralstone houses dotted around the golf course. Despite the economic crisis, there have been successful resales. "Homes bought for $300,000 off plan are already selling for $430,000 to $750,000," Linda says.

This tallies with recent research by Cluttons, which suggests inquiry levels in Barbados are up 80 per cent since the beginning of the year. At Beachlands, a development of 55 open-plan apartments on the beach near Holetown, a number of the most expensive properties have sold even though the project will not be finished until 2013. Prices range from $2 million to $8.5 million. All the apartments in the boomerang-shaped building will have sea views, there will be landscaped gardens and underground parking. "Beachlands is all about location," says Fay Davies, who is handling the marketing. "You can go snorkelling and swimming with turtles and walk along the new coastal footpath to Holetown in 10 minutes, plus Sandy Lane spa and golf course are just three minutes away."

The main downside for British buyers considering a home in Barbados is that property prices and living costs are similar to those in Britain in fact Waitrose sausages cost more. That"s not to say the island has been immune to the economic crisis. Knight Frank estimates that prices have fallen by 22 per cent over the past two years; the Barbadian government is bailing out the island"s unfinished Four Seasons resort (where Simon Cowell and Sir Philip Green have reserved homes) with a £38 million loan. "There were very few sales in 2008 and 2009," Knight Frank"s Julian Cunningham says.

Estate agents, however, are optimistic about the future. "During an economic downturn, it is always the exclusive locations that win through first," says Kieran Kelly, from Cluttons.

The recession has taught developers to be more realistic about the starting prices. It"s now possible to buy a home in Royal Westmoreland for less than £300,000. For this you will only get a one-bedroom apartment, but maybe that is good. "You don"t know how many friends you have until you have a home on Barbados," James Burdess says.

For more information about properties at Clifton Plantation, Apes Hill or Beachlands call Knight Frank on 020 7629 8171

WHY BUY IN BARBADOS

No capital gains tax, inheritance or estate taxStrong rental market five -10 per cent returnsHot, sunny weather, warm seaStable economy and governmentRegular direct flights to BritainLess time difference than other Caribbean islands